Anyways, I didn't really want to talk about the places we went to, but I did want to say that what really made the hangover worth it was at about two in the morning this kinda strange seeming Canadian guy came up and started talking to us, and I wasn't too sure about him, and he kept reminding me of something... and it didn't hit me until today, but if you've seen the episode of Flight of the Concords where they hire the dry cleaner to pose as a music label executive - that was who I met last night. This Canadian guy almost seemed like he was doing schtick, like he kept walking up and kind of hunching way over and saying, "how are we all doing?" I think he was just a nutter, but maybe the joke is on me and it was all a Kaufman-esque method of self-entertainment, although the sense I really got was that he just wanted to get laid (but when are there EVER guys like that in a bar?). When the girls I was with went to the bathroom, he was standing real close to me and looked at me and said, "looks like it's just us now. How do you feel about that?" Just like the character in FotC, I wasn't quite sure what to make of him. Anyways, it hit me today while I was laying on our sundeck (an under-construction concrete platform on the second level that I think might someday be a room), and I laughed out loud for a while.
Speaking of characters, I was sitting out front with my roommate Zaynab, and this guy came up and starting talking to us in mixed English and Spanish, he seemed a few cents short, like maybe he had aspergers or something, and he had this bag full of bread and wanted to give us some. He also wanted to tell us his name, and then he wanted to show us his ID to show he wasn't fooling us. He kept saying, "please, for you, free, no problem, no problem. Thank you, thank you!" And then he wanted to kiss Zaynab's hand, and then touch her thigh, so we had to excuse ourselves. I guess even those who are differently-abled get horny.
It's warmed up here, so it's not below freezing anymore, chilly but not cruel. I finished Spanish classes yesterday, and am really glad for the break. By my third week, the afternoon activities the school organizes were on repeat, and there was a munch less interesting, and older, student crowd (not that those things necessarily go together, but it's more fun to hang out with peeps my age who are cool. A lot of older single travelers seem like they're that because they haven't been able to make friends back home, and they always seem to have crackpot conspiracy theories, like the guy I met who said the geothermal energy in Guatemala could power the whole world, but it will never happen because of "the oil companies." Sure oil only accounts for about 1% of electricity production in the United States, and electricity can't be stored and is difficult to move long distances, but hey, fuck reality, you know?). Also, five hours a day five days a week, one on one with a teacher, is really intense! I really feel like I need time to let things sit, and to have a chance to practice. I started on the present-tense subjunctive last week, and forgot all of my normal present-tense conjugations, always substituting the subjunctive. I think it's a sign my head is full. Just to explain, Spanish has way more verb tenses than English: present, preterite, imperfect, future (both common and grammatical), conditional, and imperative. Then there's the subjunctive, and there's a separate subjunctive for each of the above, so seven subjunctives to learn. Like I said, a lot. What is that, 14? Yikes. Anyways, my classes continued to be good, my new maestra Laura and I kept the conversation going with debates about how hard it is to be poor in the United States (her view: the poor in Guatemala can at least grow their own food and not starve. My view: stuff is actually way cheaper the United States a lot of the times, while we make more money; plus our country has a ridiculous amount of material wealth that is literally left out as trash, as well as programs like food stamps and food banks), and whether or not Spanish should be adopted as a second official language of the United States (her view: the American West used to belong to Mexico, and will be over half latino in the near future, so Spanish should be adopted as a second official language. My view: English serves as a common bond between an ethnically diverse citizenry, not to mention making Spanish an official second language would probably really piss off the Chinese, Filipino, Somali, and Brazilian minorities, just as examples, especially those who had just finished their English classes). I don't think Laura was as good about correcting me as Carlos, and I think Carlos was a better teacher overall, but I think the switch was a good call overall, just for the variety.
Case in point about stuff being cheaper in the US: canned tuna (chunk light was the only type being served up) costs about $1.35 here, compared to what I want to say is about $.50 in the States. I also bought a couple of apples imported from Washington state, which were about $2/pound, which seems about the same or more than back home. Even the bananas are $.60 or $.70 cents a pound, and they actually grow a shit-ton of those around here. The tuna also came packed in either water, oil, or mayonnaise. At first that seemed really gross to me, but then I remembered that probably 90% of the time back home people open up a can of tuna and then immediately add mayonnaise to it. So why not cut out the middle-man? Fuck those guys over at Hellman's. Still, the commitment to mayonnaise is Latin America is pretty incredible, just like the commitment to soda and fried starch. In Guatemala, like in Bolivia, a "salad" just means something that is cut up and served cold, smothered in mayonnaise. Popular in my house is julienne-cut carrots and green beans - smothered in mayonnaise. Put some black pepper on it and it's OK. Still, a lot of Latin cuisine really grosses me out. Is it any wonder I lost 20 pounds living in Bolivia? I should start my own celebrity fad diet; just come live in La Paz with me for 6 months.
The food is generally good at my house though, which is one reason I'm staying for another week or so. The notable exceptions have been the Cup o' Noodles breakfast, the starchy broccoli soup breakfast, and the cold processed meatloaf type stuff that was in the vein of "visible pieces of eyeball and snout" stuff I mentioned my first day (it actually tasted OK, although I found the grainy texture disturbing). It's only about $6 a day for a room and three meals (well, two and a half, the portions are kind of small and I find myself supplementing often), and there's still a couple of things I need to do, like climb Volcano Santa Maria, and go to the Xocomil water park. In between, there's yoga classes in the morning (God, I'm all the things I hate, aren't I? Way to be a white dude from the American North West, Devin! Who wants yoga and tofu? We're healthy!!), gym or day hikes in the afternoon, and reading and people watching in Parque Central in-between. Plus, I've made friends here, I have a nice little core group to hang out with. There's Scott and Ed, the rugby-playing Brits next door, who I yell at from my sun deck if we want to go out, and my roommates Zaynab (British) and Alleen (Mississipian); Brian, friendly and laid-back in that stereotypical Canadian way, and Bethany, a cool girl from Boston who used to intern at Democracy Now and was in Belize volunteering on AIDS education and outreach for 3 months before coming here. And of course Elise, and I think I've neglected to mention it but she's here on the Adventure Learning Grant, the grant I had in South America (she's studying microfinance and women's cooperatives). And, being an extroverted introvert, I find the process of making new friends somewhat tiring and time-consuming. So I think I'm looking at another week or so in Xela; after that the plan is still to head to the Ixil Triangle. I've bumped into a lot of folks who seem to be heading there at some point, so hopefully I won't have to do all the hiking alone.
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